I originally wrote and posted this today over at Irrational Beauty, the new place I had been writing, when it occured to me that this is home. This has always been home. I can't just quit on something and move sites because I need a change. I AM that change. No matter where I go and where I write, I'm still me. This place is my history and my future; I'm not ready to walk away from that...
---
June. Wow.
I'm actually pretty amazed I've stayed away so long.
Of course, I've been writing. If you knew me at all, you'd realize how silly the thought of me not writing is. Writing simply is INSIDE me, writing is who I am at my most base level. Creative, expressive, unafraid of opening up and spilling my guts onto the page... without the ability to write I would probably die.
I know that sounds trite, but I honestly believe that.
I've felt it lately.
I got into a car accident last night. It wasn't much, although I did have to go to the hospital for neck pain. It did manage to terrify me into re-evaluating a few things about my life lately. Funny how cliche it is to assume your life will flash before your eyes, but how true it ends up being in the end.
But I'm ok. I'm on some seriously great medication that made me both sleep like a baby and have some pretty intense dreams. I even managed to pleasure myself this afternoon without throwing things TOO out of whack. I'm dedicated that way.
But it did make me realize that I need to write more. Especially when my creative outlets have mostly come from Myspace. It's the armpit of the creative world, but I've felt more safe keeping some things to myself lately. Don't ask me why; it's unlike me to be so closed-off.
So, I'm back. Don't know for how long, or what will come out, but I'm here.
---
June. Wow.
I'm actually pretty amazed I've stayed away so long.
Of course, I've been writing. If you knew me at all, you'd realize how silly the thought of me not writing is. Writing simply is INSIDE me, writing is who I am at my most base level. Creative, expressive, unafraid of opening up and spilling my guts onto the page... without the ability to write I would probably die.
I know that sounds trite, but I honestly believe that.
I've felt it lately.
I got into a car accident last night. It wasn't much, although I did have to go to the hospital for neck pain. It did manage to terrify me into re-evaluating a few things about my life lately. Funny how cliche it is to assume your life will flash before your eyes, but how true it ends up being in the end.
But I'm ok. I'm on some seriously great medication that made me both sleep like a baby and have some pretty intense dreams. I even managed to pleasure myself this afternoon without throwing things TOO out of whack. I'm dedicated that way.
But it did make me realize that I need to write more. Especially when my creative outlets have mostly come from Myspace. It's the armpit of the creative world, but I've felt more safe keeping some things to myself lately. Don't ask me why; it's unlike me to be so closed-off.
So, I'm back. Don't know for how long, or what will come out, but I'm here.
This entry was posted by Mellie, on
Thursday, September 25, 2008.
