The laughing couple holding hands while driving their minivan down a suburban street as their child sleeps in the car seat behind them. Women scrubbing their sinks happily as energetic children track mud across their spotless white tile kitchen floors. Men leaving for the office in the morning, briefcase in one hand and a travel mug of coffee in the other, pausing for a moment to turn towards the door and smile at the wife waiting there as the sun rises.
I understand that it's advertising. The entire concept of advertising is to present an unrealistic future, the golden standard, something obviously unattainable but close enough to our reach that we view it as the ring on the carousel. Our idealistic vision of our perfect lives.
I still feel uncomfortable watching them. It's not that I don't have love in my life; Bear and I hold hands in public enough to make anyone ill. I've just never wanted that sort of mundane future for myself... The 2.5 children. The picket fence. Being a stay at home mother while my husband works hard and comes home to find a spotless house and dinner on the table.
I've always wanted more for myself. The things I aspire to, have always aspired to, are things that truly make a difference. I don't base my worth on how clean my sink is, how many cars I have or how many square feet my house is. The idea of living in suburbia, in the picture perfect cardboard cut out home, makes me feel sick. I'm a free spirit. I want to live in the hustle and bustle. I want museums. I want food choices that aren't chain restaurants. I want my daughter to grow up knowing what diversity really looks like.
Yet, viewing those ads, I feel like the freak. Like my desires for life are somehow less realistic than everyone else's desires. I'm a mother, but I teach my child that life sucks and that she'll need to be prepared to defend her choices. I'm a lover, but I feel most valued when I'm being forcefully pressed to the bed and tears are streaming from my eyes. I'm a student, but I'm the first to raise my hand and challenge a position. Is that less valid? Less worthy of praise?
I understand that it's advertising. The entire concept of advertising is to present an unrealistic future, the golden standard, something obviously unattainable but close enough to our reach that we view it as the ring on the carousel. Our idealistic vision of our perfect lives.
I still feel uncomfortable watching them. It's not that I don't have love in my life; Bear and I hold hands in public enough to make anyone ill. I've just never wanted that sort of mundane future for myself... The 2.5 children. The picket fence. Being a stay at home mother while my husband works hard and comes home to find a spotless house and dinner on the table.
I've always wanted more for myself. The things I aspire to, have always aspired to, are things that truly make a difference. I don't base my worth on how clean my sink is, how many cars I have or how many square feet my house is. The idea of living in suburbia, in the picture perfect cardboard cut out home, makes me feel sick. I'm a free spirit. I want to live in the hustle and bustle. I want museums. I want food choices that aren't chain restaurants. I want my daughter to grow up knowing what diversity really looks like.
Yet, viewing those ads, I feel like the freak. Like my desires for life are somehow less realistic than everyone else's desires. I'm a mother, but I teach my child that life sucks and that she'll need to be prepared to defend her choices. I'm a lover, but I feel most valued when I'm being forcefully pressed to the bed and tears are streaming from my eyes. I'm a student, but I'm the first to raise my hand and challenge a position. Is that less valid? Less worthy of praise?
This entry was posted by Mellie, on
Thursday, January 11, 2007.
