There is a safety in his arms, a safety I have yet to recreate outside of physical contact with him. The world could be crashing and burning around us, a virtual Armageddon, and I would still go to hell with a smile on my face and a calm soul. He does that for me, that wonderful man.

Most days, most years, I am my own sanctity. I am the calm inside my heart, I am the slow beating of my pulse. Lately, I've found that it's only in his eyes that I can be as complete as I always thought I was. He believes in me, he needs me, he depends on me. That makes me a lot more dependable to myself.

I don't believe that anyone is ever completely whole. There are always unexplored facets of the human condition, pieces of personality that is completely unknown to even our unconcious mind. Believe it or not, that is relieving to me. I would hate to get bored of myself. I enjoy, most times, finding out why I behave the way that I do.

But he gets me. He talks to me in a way I would never let anyone else talk to me. He loves me, he knows me inside and out. Perhaps that's why I submit to him. How could I not trust a man that knows me better than I do?

I'm not intending on letting this blog become a personal love letter for him. He knows how I feel, I know how he feels. It's just that sometimes things happen that make me more aware of how lucky I am, how life does sometimes work out for the better.

If you've stuck around past all that, you deserve a treat. :)

This entry was posted by Mellie, on Tuesday, June 07, 2005.